Business Networking

Last week hubby has a meeting appointment at 6pm about a future project. His meeting is short. By 7pm he's making his way home so we can have dinner together. He later showed me all the name cards of his new business contact and said it would be good if I could make similar contact for my future training. I have no doubt about that but let me tell you what I noticed from the name cards and the meeting.

- They are all men.

Good! I don't fancy hubby seeing any women after business hour even in the name of future project. But wait a minute.... hubby's not going to be very happy if I meet all those men after business hour in the name of networking either. Office visit during working hours is tolerable.

- They are in a position that would be a good contact for me.

Nevertheless, I don't like using hubby's name for my projects. People may do it all the time but I'd like it to be due to my professional capacity and if later they found out they knew hubby, that would be a different matter. Sometimes I wonder whether that's ego or professionalism. Most Asian conglomerates do that i.e. through known contacts. By Asian conglomerates, I didn't include political cronies of course.

Just look at how the Chinese do business. They help each other and depend on each other. "You got no supply, borrow mine first... I'll replace them later.... My brother is providing that kind of service... My relatives can do that.... I know someone who can do that too...." That way all their businesses grow.

We Malaysian are either too blatantly unashamed of being called a crony or too ashamed of being called one.

Hey! back to the issue of position, where's all the women in that position that would be a good contact for me? I thought we have more women in the university, in the work place and in high position!

- They meet after work.

How nice. That way the atmosphere is more relaxed and the meeting could be attendend by more people at a neutral place like at the Mamak's, Kopitiam or cafe. Errr... I think most female colleagues I know will be rushing home after work to fetch their children at the day care no matter what their position.

Probably there are women out there who networked the way the men networked, but I haven't met them. I know there are many women who work way beyond office hours and leaving the household tasks to maids, but working is not the same as networking. If this is the way men and women do their business, how can we women create a good network? Should we follow the men's way or should we create a unique networking way to adapt to the women's way? If so, how? I think this a big question that can become a business PhD topic :)

Having said that, it will be a loooonnnggg way before I can write my PhD papers so I still have to find business contacts either the men's way or women's way. As I'm writing this entry, it occur to me probably I'm making the wrong contact all these while. They are the right contacts actually, but not right for me. Things are not happening the way I want them to be. So if what we do didn't give us the outcome we want, it's time to do things differently. I'm off to digest this information and figure out how to get the outcome I want. It's not like I have not been doing it already but now with a different approach :)

Site to explore:
1. Business Network International Malaysia
2. National Association of Women Entrepreneurs of Malaysia (NAWEM)

Why I Hate Going To Kuantan?

Do you know what I hate about going to Kuantan? It's the drive there. First, it's the winding road. Then, it's the never ending road maintenance work. When did you ever drive to Kuantan on LPT and there's no road maintenance work somewhere? That must be a miraculous day for you.

The road maintenance work is really annoying. You got to wonder how did the project get approved in the first place, who's the soil engineer, and who gets all the road maintenance project now?

Yesterday hubby called at about 5:45pm and informed me instead of afternoon meeting, he has to be in Kuantan early morning today. He left early for a whole day meeting at Tg. Malim yesterday before another meeting at Subang Jaya at 6pm. He'd be very tired to drive to Kuantan alone last night. So as the appointed PA and driver, I make some phone calls for accommodation, packed our luggage, have dinner together and make our journey east.

Hubby reached our place at about 8pm and has to wait for about 10 minutes before I came down. He wondered why it took me so long to pack. Sigh! I think men will just pack and leave. Besides packing, I throw all our rubbish away especially the kitchen waste, collect drying clothes and hang them to dry inside the house, water our plants, turn off switches or unplug some electrical equipment and make sure all doors and windows are closed before leaving.

I also have to decide what to do with my time when he works. Whether I should do my work in the hotel room, survey some place or meet people for future training, or laze around and consider I'm taking a short holiday. All that determines what clothes and things I should bring along. Men probably don't appreciate the art of all these little decisions. He probably sums it up as indecision. Double sigh!

Anyway, back to the driving part... hubby's allergic to the steering wheel even if he's not tired. The moment he gets behind one, most of the time he'll get sleepy. I can't sit comfortably next to him as he yawned, shake head to keep himself awake, rub or slap neck, sigh, double sighs and triple sighs, listen to Tamil songs, rocking back and forth on his seat and many other gestures. Sometimes I tried my best to massage his neck, shoulder and back with one hand while seating beside him but it only works for a short while. The few times I just let him be was either when I was too tired myself and my suggestion for both of us to rest for a while fall on deaf ears or when I offered to drive and he stubbornly continued driving.

Many times I have replaced him as the driver and the moment he sat beside the driver's place, he's wide awake. That's what happened last night. He's wide awake almost the whole way and started commenting and asking me to slow down whenever there's that annoying orange cone. I didn't respond to any of his comments. We're both tired. It's best to say nothing than say something I might regret later. However, putting things in perspective, sometimes I did feel like making comments while hubby's driving too. Maybe I even did. I have to ask him whether I have ever annoyed him with comments while he's driving. Last night, I let hubby took the wheels after Gambang exit.

What matters most, we reached the hotel room safely few minutes before midnight.

In the evening, we have to go through the same road work maintenance again to reach KL. Hubby looked drained and tired the moment he reached hotel from his client's place. I took the wheel the whole way till we reached home. This time he only commented once :) After a quick reviving massage for hubby once we reached home, hubby has to leave again for like another 2 hours journey to be with his other family. So all the above sums up why I hate going to Kuantan in a long-winded way, just like the winding Karak stretch.