Remembering Baby

It has been one year today.

I'm feeling little bit sad, a little bit lost....

Sometimes I'm looking for answers of don't know what, hoping for the great revelation on the mysteries of life.

Rainy stuffy night

It's raining heavily since around 6 p.m. but I'm feeling very  hot. Last night we slept under the stars. Literally. We've slept in a tent before, we've slept under the porch... but last night I can feel the heat even sleeping outside.

It wasn't a very comfortable sleep though. I woke up a few times swatting the mosquito away. It did went away and came back few hours later. If it continues singing near my head I would've asked hubby to abandon the thought of sleeping outside. We went in around 5 in the morning. Hubby said it's cool outside but I was feeling hot and sweaty that I immediately took a shower once inside.

I'm not sure whether it's the early morning shower or soaking the dew throughout the night but my body aches and all much joints felt painful. Our comforter and mat were damp from the dew. Felt a bit better once hubby massage my back for a while. I thought of going for a massage tomorrow but I feel much better as the day progreses.

No more sleeping under the stars. My old bones can't take it. I hope it'll cool down tonight. I don't want to use the air conditioning. Won't do much good to my sinus and asthma. I just hope I can sleep comfortably tonight.

Mission: Wardrobe Audit

Auditing the content of my wardrobe has been on my mind for quite some time already. Even though I kept all my nice slim clothes from before marriage as a motivation to go back to pre-wedding size, it doesn't seem like it's gonna happen anytime soon.

I have many nighties that I can still wear but I've had them for years, blouses that I don't really fancy hence rarely or almost never wear them, blouses that I like but has lost buttons or need to be sewn here and there, old tshirt, work clothes that are too short and hubby didn't approve, old pants and baju kurung and kebaya and the list can go on and on... Sigh!

What do I do with them? Repurpose? Donate? Throw away?

Tonight I'm going to start categorizing the clothes and separate them from definite yes for current wear, clothes that I still love but needs repair and the Nos for current wear. I'll probably have to categorize the Nos into several categories but I'll tackle that later. One thing at a time. OK... let's get started.

Relax and Reflect

Three and a half hours drive to destination, two hours talk.... now resting at the hotel. Otherwise three and a half hours drive back. Darling hubby sudah membebel. My associate company managed to negotiate for an accommodation for me from the client.

Alhamdulillah... this is the first engagement for the year. Macam orang buka kedai pagi-pagi, rezeki yang pertama tu amat penting sekali sampai biasanya customer boleh bargain betul-betul untuk dapat murah.  Hopefully, this year will be a better year than 2012 in terms of training projects.

This year is the 5th year I quit my full time job and venture into freelance training. I've become better trainer insyaAllah with the help of few mentor. I know I will continue changing and improving because everytime I revised my training contents, I found ways to make them better. Knowledge is never static. Hopefully I will have more opportunities to learn and better myself as a trainer.

Tonight, alone in the room without worrying about having to conduct any training tomorrow, I can sit back, relax and reflect. Hopefully I will not fell asleep early :D

Health... or rather, lack of

Since day 1 of 2013, it has been:-
- headache
- few days of flu
- coughing... never good for my asthma
- feverish

I'm feeling especially weak today. No energy to do anything :(

Praying for better health throughout the year. Can't wait to feel energetic, can-conquer-the-world feeling again.

The 2013

The end of the year happens to be the busiest year for hubby. We managed to take short holiday break though. On the last day of 2012 where people gather for countdowns, hubby returned home at around 8:30 pm famished and tired. He didn't sleep much the night before trying to do some work and didn't take his lunch. After dinner, he tried to stay awake by watching a movie and fell asleep at around 10:30. The countdown didn't matter much to me too. We just returned from a short holiday the day before and sleeping is a much better option than staying awake. Besides, I promised hubby to accompany him to work on New Year's day.

Hubby changed plan the next day though. He woke up at 3 a.m. and can't sleep so he did some work in the wee hours of morning. We went for a jog, breakfast and then went through a movie marathon. Skyfall is very different from other Bond movies in that there's not much fancy gadget. The theme of the movie, sometimes the old ways works best. And the male villain seduced Bond hahaha... Really had a good laugh with hubby. They really want to show something different this time. The movie feels long with some boring episodes that hubby fell asleep a few times. Next movie is The Departed. Kinda too heavy for my taste. This is when I went to cook lunch. We had a late lunch. Final movie for the day is How To Lose A Guy in 10 Days. Not hubby's kind of movie but he sat through it with me. We even took long prayer and nap break in between the movie.

I started to get pounding headache after the break which kinda puzzles me. I just woke up from a nap, took a bath and shampoo my hair. Other possibilities could be due to hunger but I don't feel hungry. It gets worse and during Maghrib prayer I started to feel nauseous. That's when I realized that it is actually due to hunger though for some reason I didn't feel hungry. Quickly had dinner with hot tea. I tried to down my dinner in between trying to burp and let all the gas out. Throw up a bit and my head was still pounding. Hubby tried to massage my head.but the pain only subsides a little. Normally, a headache due to hunger will quickly be cured after a meal. I guess this time I noticed too late the signals my body was telling me. So I went to sleep early. Even before Isyak prayer. Thank God I can fall asleep with the pain. So that's my 2013 New Year's Day... the worst headache in my life.

Woke up at around 12:30 a.m. when hubby went to bed. Headaches's gone Alhamdulillah. Tried to sleep, tossed and turned while trying not to disturb hubby too much, played game on my phone, jot down ideas, read my FB and still can't sleep. Performed my isyak prayer around 3 a.m. and tossed and turned again till 4 a.m. Hubby woke up for a while and told him I can't sleep. Hubby tried to sleep again and later woke up to continue doing his work. I probably dozed off some time after that and woke up at 6.15. Ironed hubby's clothes as he needs to get to work early.

Today, must make sure I have meals on time and listen to what my body's telling me. Yesterday, I do feel like I wanted to eat something for tea but hubby remarked didn't we just had lunch? I remembered our late lunch and jogging in the morning and decided not to eat anything for tea. Didn't realy feel hungry. Not sure whether it is need to eat something or want to eat something. What's the equivalent word for 'sebu' in English? I have no idea. Probably that's what I'm feeling. Anyway, that episode has passed and we shall continue with more episodes in 2013. I pray for happier, better and greater episodes. Some photos below from my short holiday break.

 At Taman Rekreasi Ayer Keroh Melaka...

 Hubby's company gathering...

Into the not so dark cave... at Gua Tempurung