I can officially say the dreaded event this week is over. True to what's been said... it doesn't matter anymore now and will be forgotten in time. Whatever brouhaha I was feeling, it's gone. All that matter is the love from my loved ones.... my dear hubby, my dear sis, my lovely boys and family members.
Why oh why does the issue seemed to loom large before? When I was going through it, everything in my mind seemed logical, whatever was said or done seemed logical. Now, I realize how stupid it was... how stupid I was. My only excuse is probably I need to go through the process to see the real picture. But in the process, I have hurt the people around me. It is easy to apologize... which I truly sincerely do because I realize I was wrong. I believe its not as easy to heal the wound. The only good thing coming out from this event is I love them even more for putting up with my emotional outburst.
I love you all... please accept my sincerest apologies.
Sunflower gives the connotation of cheerfulness, bright, jolly, merry... you get the idea! However, if any content in this blog didn't fit the cheerfulness implied by its name, look at it this way... I'm putting down all the wretchedness, gloom, melancholy feeling in here so I can continue living up to the expectation of making the association to the sunflower.
Friday, August 19, 2011
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
What's great about today?
10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react.
We spend wonderful relaxing night last night... at least for me. Don't know what hubby was thinking going from rack to rack looking for baju raya :) We spend wonderful day the first half of today too. What's important is we have those time and spend it together. No one can take that away from us. The precious time spent together... I would only hope for times like what we had when I'm busy. So the times spent together would beat any unimportant events. No bouquet of flower or gifts can beat that. Alhamdulillah...
Tonight is relaxing night for me again and I'm going to appreciate it.
We spend wonderful relaxing night last night... at least for me. Don't know what hubby was thinking going from rack to rack looking for baju raya :) We spend wonderful day the first half of today too. What's important is we have those time and spend it together. No one can take that away from us. The precious time spent together... I would only hope for times like what we had when I'm busy. So the times spent together would beat any unimportant events. No bouquet of flower or gifts can beat that. Alhamdulillah...
Tonight is relaxing night for me again and I'm going to appreciate it.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4
Outcast II
I hope today will end differently. Who am I kidding? I'll just pretend the second half of today never happen. God give me strength. You ARE the bigger picture of my existence.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4
Monday, August 15, 2011
Outcast
It hurts when you are deemed an outcast because of who or what you represent instead of who you really are. Normally I couldn't be bothered about others opinion. This time it really hurts because hubby has to concede to those opinion. This will be a difficult week for me. Everytime I remembers about it, I have to take a deeeeeppp.... breath.
I hope I'll be given the strength to pass this test. Like everything that has happened to me, only Allah knows the wisdom behind every fate and destiny. Only He knows why I have to go through this. Those people, even hubby, are only fulfilling His will of giving me this lesson in life.
Do not cry coz my head will hurt later. Do not be sad because those people will be enjoying themselves and do not bother about my feelings anyway. Easier said then done but I have to for my sake. I have to keep reminding myself of the bigger picture of life instead of this tiny scar that might be forgotten few years down the road.
Hopefully this week will pass quickly. Hopefully I'll be fine. Hope is the only thing I have. Laa tahzan...
I hope I'll be given the strength to pass this test. Like everything that has happened to me, only Allah knows the wisdom behind every fate and destiny. Only He knows why I have to go through this. Those people, even hubby, are only fulfilling His will of giving me this lesson in life.
Do not cry coz my head will hurt later. Do not be sad because those people will be enjoying themselves and do not bother about my feelings anyway. Easier said then done but I have to for my sake. I have to keep reminding myself of the bigger picture of life instead of this tiny scar that might be forgotten few years down the road.
Hopefully this week will pass quickly. Hopefully I'll be fine. Hope is the only thing I have. Laa tahzan...
Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Bright Morning
It's a bright Saturday morning. It has been like this for a few days. Come afternoon, it started to get cloudy and yesterday it rained heavily. The air feels cleaner today. I'm breathing deeply and feeling thankful for the nice fresh air. Love it...
I'm actually in a good mood since my classmate called yesterday. She's dropping a subject. Another classmate SMSed and she's doing the same. Yeah... I'm glad I have an option. Means I can drop the subject too and take it next semester with them. I thought I'd be worse off this sem with the commitment required on the subject as well as my trainings. We have a lecturer who has just completed his PhD and so excited to teach a class he forgot we are part time students and can't give the commitment required for all the coursework. Can you imagine a coursework that gives you 4 marks and we have 4 of those. We also have 2 big assignments of 20 pages each, worth 20 marks each and a final exam of 40%. He also expected drafts twice for each big assignments. Another 4% is for a presentation. Sigh! I hyperventilated in class last weekend as he was explaining about our coursework.
I had a meeting last Friday with my training associate company. We're expecting a project that would take us to East Malaysia and it would be a series of 5-days training. I can't imagine 5 days away from home, returning to slave for my Master's class. Now, I can breathe a bit. If the department let us drop the subject, it means we'll have afternoon class after this. Whatever it is, we'll find out tomorrow. For now, I have to make some preparation for tomorrow's class while enjoying the bright sunshine. Oh... I need to prepare something for the training too. We have a bunch of trainers for this so I'm only helping out with some of the assessment questions. Have a great weekend everyone:)
I'm actually in a good mood since my classmate called yesterday. She's dropping a subject. Another classmate SMSed and she's doing the same. Yeah... I'm glad I have an option. Means I can drop the subject too and take it next semester with them. I thought I'd be worse off this sem with the commitment required on the subject as well as my trainings. We have a lecturer who has just completed his PhD and so excited to teach a class he forgot we are part time students and can't give the commitment required for all the coursework. Can you imagine a coursework that gives you 4 marks and we have 4 of those. We also have 2 big assignments of 20 pages each, worth 20 marks each and a final exam of 40%. He also expected drafts twice for each big assignments. Another 4% is for a presentation. Sigh! I hyperventilated in class last weekend as he was explaining about our coursework.
I had a meeting last Friday with my training associate company. We're expecting a project that would take us to East Malaysia and it would be a series of 5-days training. I can't imagine 5 days away from home, returning to slave for my Master's class. Now, I can breathe a bit. If the department let us drop the subject, it means we'll have afternoon class after this. Whatever it is, we'll find out tomorrow. For now, I have to make some preparation for tomorrow's class while enjoying the bright sunshine. Oh... I need to prepare something for the training too. We have a bunch of trainers for this so I'm only helping out with some of the assessment questions. Have a great weekend everyone:)
Friday, August 12, 2011
Belated Birthday Note
I've been busy with trainings and deadlines but I make sure I don't have any on my birthday. The plan is to have a memorable day and that certainly happened, and then some.
The night before my birthday, we went out for dinner and a movie. The first movie since we moved house. The movie of choice was 'Monte Carlo'. We purposely not choose Harry Porter or Transformers. I wanted to have something light and entertaining. It certainly didn't disappoint though I have to censor some scene by closing hubby's eyes a few times ;) That was a relaxing outing except for the glitches with GSC online system and that's another story.
And then we reached home, hubby totally forgot the match between Chelsea and Malaysia was that night. We reached home, hubby switched on our trusted TV set and pooff... nothing. Hubby's TV set stopped working few months before we moved house. Instead of buying new one, we took my tv set out from our guest bedroom to the living room. We don't want to deal with the hassle of transporting fragile TV when moving. Many things either broke or stopped working when we unpacked. The TV set from our guest bedroom was from the time before I got married. It finally reached the last of its service duration the night before my birthday.
So, the mission on my birthday is to find a new TV. It has overshadowed looking for my birthday gift. Something that I don't want to hear on my birthday made me shout in the jewellery shop... on the phone. The stupid lawyer's office has delayed yet again the final part of the S&P deal. Stupid lawyers!!! That got me feeling uptight for a few days and that's another story again.
After going to few shops, returned home for lunch and Friday prayers, we went to make the purchase. So we got a TV on my birthday. After that I got busy for my final exam and another 5 days training. We went out for dinner and I need to buy something for final training day when we found my birthday gift. Hubby's in a hurry for another football match. This time he do not want to missed it. I bought a watch for myself after my final exam and I also got myself a new purse. Both in real need of replacement which I have been postponing of getting till my birthday.
So that were some of the events that took place during my birthday. Rushed and tried to make the best of the time we had. I really appreciate our date night and the moments hubby spent picking out my birthday gift. TQ abang.
The night before my birthday, we went out for dinner and a movie. The first movie since we moved house. The movie of choice was 'Monte Carlo'. We purposely not choose Harry Porter or Transformers. I wanted to have something light and entertaining. It certainly didn't disappoint though I have to censor some scene by closing hubby's eyes a few times ;) That was a relaxing outing except for the glitches with GSC online system and that's another story.
And then we reached home, hubby totally forgot the match between Chelsea and Malaysia was that night. We reached home, hubby switched on our trusted TV set and pooff... nothing. Hubby's TV set stopped working few months before we moved house. Instead of buying new one, we took my tv set out from our guest bedroom to the living room. We don't want to deal with the hassle of transporting fragile TV when moving. Many things either broke or stopped working when we unpacked. The TV set from our guest bedroom was from the time before I got married. It finally reached the last of its service duration the night before my birthday.
So, the mission on my birthday is to find a new TV. It has overshadowed looking for my birthday gift. Something that I don't want to hear on my birthday made me shout in the jewellery shop... on the phone. The stupid lawyer's office has delayed yet again the final part of the S&P deal. Stupid lawyers!!! That got me feeling uptight for a few days and that's another story again.
After going to few shops, returned home for lunch and Friday prayers, we went to make the purchase. So we got a TV on my birthday. After that I got busy for my final exam and another 5 days training. We went out for dinner and I need to buy something for final training day when we found my birthday gift. Hubby's in a hurry for another football match. This time he do not want to missed it. I bought a watch for myself after my final exam and I also got myself a new purse. Both in real need of replacement which I have been postponing of getting till my birthday.
So that were some of the events that took place during my birthday. Rushed and tried to make the best of the time we had. I really appreciate our date night and the moments hubby spent picking out my birthday gift. TQ abang.
Life's Little Pleasures...
What gives you a great pleasure after a tiring day? I decided to list down in no particular order, most of them and be thankful with life's little pleasures.
1. a hot shower and splash of talcum powder at the end of the day
2. hot tea
3. foot massage on my osim
4. foot massage by hubby
5. cuddling in front of tv
6. sitting out at night with hubby, listening to the sound of the night
7. the moment we have some meals ready... don't have to think about eating out or what to eat...
8. lying in bed
9. sleeping
10. the knowledge that tomorrow will be spent at home, without any pressing deadlines...
Today, I have 1, 2, 3, 7, 10 and soon... 8 and 9. That's a lot of pleasure :)
1. a hot shower and splash of talcum powder at the end of the day
2. hot tea
3. foot massage on my osim
4. foot massage by hubby
5. cuddling in front of tv
6. sitting out at night with hubby, listening to the sound of the night
7. the moment we have some meals ready... don't have to think about eating out or what to eat...
8. lying in bed
9. sleeping
10. the knowledge that tomorrow will be spent at home, without any pressing deadlines...
Today, I have 1, 2, 3, 7, 10 and soon... 8 and 9. That's a lot of pleasure :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)