I've been having this headache since Friday and it worries me. Last two weeks I have flu out of the blue and I noticed it finally stopped on Friday. No more blowing and stuffed nose. But then I noticed the headache and the painful sinus bones. It subsides a little sometimes but at times it came back with a vengence, like now. While battling my headache, I have to submit my assignment. Thank God only have to submit draft because I'm feeling totally lost and overwhelmed with the subject. I just submitted an incomplete copy. However, time is not on my side. I have training this week and another draft submission. Then away on holiday and final assignment submission. I have to complete them no matter what and this subject is killing me.
29/5 - Essay draft submission
1-2/6 - Training
05/6 - Research proposal draft submission
8-11/6 - Holiday
12/6 - Essay submission
14-16/6 - Training
18/6 - Research proposal submission
26/6 - Presentation
03/7 - Presentation
4-8/7 - Training
10/7 - Final exam
17/7 - Final exam
Help me Allah!
Sunflower gives the connotation of cheerfulness, bright, jolly, merry... you get the idea! However, if any content in this blog didn't fit the cheerfulness implied by its name, look at it this way... I'm putting down all the wretchedness, gloom, melancholy feeling in here so I can continue living up to the expectation of making the association to the sunflower.
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Friday, May 27, 2011
Today's Status
4 hours ago...
Painful sinus bones, plus headache.
3 hours ago...
Life on the road today... MRR2 - KESAS - Shah Alam - Puchong - SKVE - Seri Kembangan - MRR2 - Kinrara - Puchong - KESAS - MRR2
2 hours ago...
So hungry has not eaten a proper lunch.
1 hour ago...
Feeling sad for an unknown reason.
The stall in front of my condo is not there today. Argghhh...
Alhamdulillah... nasi kukus for lunch + dinner
Few minutes ago...
Feeling better... but tired.
Few seconds ago...
Jealous.
Painful sinus bones, plus headache.
3 hours ago...
Life on the road today... MRR2 - KESAS - Shah Alam - Puchong - SKVE - Seri Kembangan - MRR2 - Kinrara - Puchong - KESAS - MRR2
2 hours ago...
So hungry has not eaten a proper lunch.
1 hour ago...
Feeling sad for an unknown reason.
The stall in front of my condo is not there today. Argghhh...
Alhamdulillah... nasi kukus for lunch + dinner
Few minutes ago...
Feeling better... but tired.
Few seconds ago...
Jealous.
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Sunday, May 22, 2011
Bite What You Can Chew
Today, class finished early. I went to the library to pick up a reserved book, only to discover I actually needed a different volume. Sigh! But thank God the library is open during this short semester break. It was a really, really thick handbook. Have to go to the library one of these days and return all the books I don't need. I've borrowed 20 already. I will certainly need a trolley to cart them to the library. I woke up at 4 a.m. this morning to complete my assignment. I've made attempts to complete them earlier but it seems the last minute pressure managed to force me to think fast for the answers. It wasn't perfect but it was better than nothing.
Yesterday was spent worrying and preparing for my training tomorrow. I should still be worried about my training preparation but too tired to think about it now. I've just taken a nap and is feeling much better. I'll prepare all the materials tonight as tomorrow I have to be off to Shah Alam early. This is a huge note to myself... next time do not take the training job if it is not really my forte no matter how people convinced me otherwise. The pressure is too much to bear especially when I have pressure from my Master's class as well. I'll have to face this pressure for 4.5 days. Even a normal training of 2 or 3 days would be tiring enough already. Remember this: Not your forte, don't do it.
It is really challenging and I'm so looking forward for end of training. Thank God we don't have classes for the next 2 weekend but I have first draft extended essay submission next weekend and research proposal draft the weekend after. I have to find time to do my extended essay during this week and I'll definitely be slaving on the essay on Saturday for Sunday submission. I also have a 2-days training the week after but since it is my area, I can relax a bit. On top of all this, I'm also worried about our house renovation. Hmmm..... worrying will not accomplish anything right! So, relaaaxxxx.... and do my best. I will really appreciate the free time once all this is over.
Yesterday was spent worrying and preparing for my training tomorrow. I should still be worried about my training preparation but too tired to think about it now. I've just taken a nap and is feeling much better. I'll prepare all the materials tonight as tomorrow I have to be off to Shah Alam early. This is a huge note to myself... next time do not take the training job if it is not really my forte no matter how people convinced me otherwise. The pressure is too much to bear especially when I have pressure from my Master's class as well. I'll have to face this pressure for 4.5 days. Even a normal training of 2 or 3 days would be tiring enough already. Remember this: Not your forte, don't do it.
It is really challenging and I'm so looking forward for end of training. Thank God we don't have classes for the next 2 weekend but I have first draft extended essay submission next weekend and research proposal draft the weekend after. I have to find time to do my extended essay during this week and I'll definitely be slaving on the essay on Saturday for Sunday submission. I also have a 2-days training the week after but since it is my area, I can relax a bit. On top of all this, I'm also worried about our house renovation. Hmmm..... worrying will not accomplish anything right! So, relaaaxxxx.... and do my best. I will really appreciate the free time once all this is over.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Syukur
Dah 2-3 hari entri ni tersimpan dan tak sempat disiapkan. Today, hopefully it will finally gets published.
Baru saja menonton petikan ceramah Dr Asri di YouTube. Laa Tahzan, innallaha ma'ana.... jadilah insan yang bersyukur dengan apa yang kita ada. Bukan tidak boleh mengharapkan apa yang kita tiada... tetapi janganlah lupa bersyukur dengan nikmat yang kita ada. Jangan bila dah tiada kaki, baru terasa nikmat dapat berpijak di atas bumi. Fikirlah dari saat kita lahir, hingga sekarang ini, betapa banyak nikmat yang perlu kita syukuri. Ada cendikiawan yang berkata, tingkat mereka yang bersyukur lebih tinggi dari orang yang bersabar. Kerana ramai orang perlu bersabar dengan sesuatu keadaan yang susah, dan mereka tiada pilihan melainkan bersabar. Tetapi tidak ramai yang bersyukur dengan kesenangan yang mereka kecapi.
People often say motivation doesn't last. Well, so does bathing. That's why we do it daily. -ZigZaglar-
Samalah juga dengan iman. Perlu sentiasa disuburkan dengan tazkirah, ceramah dan peringatan2. Harap2 I will always be among His humble servant who frequently say 'Alhamdulillah'. Memang banyak perkara yang perlu disyukuri dalam hidup ini. Banyak juga petunjuk kebesaranNya yang menjadikan sesuatu mengikut kehendakNya. Namun, ada juga perkara yang kuharapkan... seperti seorang cahaya mata... untuk menghiasi keluarga kami, yang masih belum diizinkanNya.
Isnin lepas, berjumpa my gynae for follow up session and she recommended Chlomid. I was kinda excited with the possibility. It was all very clinical, time measured, technical steps to ensure baby is conceived. But then, I'll be conducting a whole week training next week and can't go to the clinic for an injection. My gynae said I could still do without the injection but the timing must be right, which could pose a problem considering the timing of my ovulation time. Anyhow, I'd give it a go. We'll settle issues the best way we can. After taking the tablets at night, I have a mild allergic reaction the next afternoon. I tried again the second time... my eyes swell again. I read up about Chlomid and allergic reaction, and the general consensus was to stop immediately if any allergic reaction occur. Normally my allergic reaction would be really bad. I'd consider this reaction very mild. But prolonged doses could increase the risk. Should I stop or continue? Then hubby break the news he has to 'balik sana' early next week. I was devastated. I mean... of all the time, this could be our only chance.
I stopped myself before I get very emotional. It is all in His will. Kun fa yakun... The youtube video watched earlier calmed me down too. Astaghfirullahalazim.. I've had so many blessings and experienced many things that shows His power. 'La ilaha illa anta, subhanaka, inni kuntu minaz-zalimin'. Jika kita rasa kekurangan sesuatu, perhatikanlah apakah pula kelebihan yang kita ada. Jika kita rasa kita tidak dapat apa yang kita inginkan, perhatikanlah apa yang kita dah diberikan. I'm blessed with the love from people around me, I've spent many tender loving moments with hubby, and I've a job that some people envy. Alhamdulillah... I'll still be praying for a baby, but I'll not let this setback upset me too much. Dia lebih tahu apa yang terbaik untuk hambaNya.
I remember once I blogged about how difficult it is to sit down at home and have lunch together with hubby when I was working full time. Now, we have many of that moments together either with tapau or home cooked meals. Last time, we waited for public holiday that falls on weekdays to spend time together doing things that people normally do on holidays. Nowadays, we have many free time when I have no training and hubby's not busy. I appreciate our movie nights, jalan2 and cuddling moments that we share. I've make some lifestyle changes to enjoy what matters to me most and I'll keep counting my blessings throughout my life insyaAllah.
Baru saja menonton petikan ceramah Dr Asri di YouTube. Laa Tahzan, innallaha ma'ana.... jadilah insan yang bersyukur dengan apa yang kita ada. Bukan tidak boleh mengharapkan apa yang kita tiada... tetapi janganlah lupa bersyukur dengan nikmat yang kita ada. Jangan bila dah tiada kaki, baru terasa nikmat dapat berpijak di atas bumi. Fikirlah dari saat kita lahir, hingga sekarang ini, betapa banyak nikmat yang perlu kita syukuri. Ada cendikiawan yang berkata, tingkat mereka yang bersyukur lebih tinggi dari orang yang bersabar. Kerana ramai orang perlu bersabar dengan sesuatu keadaan yang susah, dan mereka tiada pilihan melainkan bersabar. Tetapi tidak ramai yang bersyukur dengan kesenangan yang mereka kecapi.
People often say motivation doesn't last. Well, so does bathing. That's why we do it daily. -ZigZaglar-
Samalah juga dengan iman. Perlu sentiasa disuburkan dengan tazkirah, ceramah dan peringatan2. Harap2 I will always be among His humble servant who frequently say 'Alhamdulillah'. Memang banyak perkara yang perlu disyukuri dalam hidup ini. Banyak juga petunjuk kebesaranNya yang menjadikan sesuatu mengikut kehendakNya. Namun, ada juga perkara yang kuharapkan... seperti seorang cahaya mata... untuk menghiasi keluarga kami, yang masih belum diizinkanNya.
Isnin lepas, berjumpa my gynae for follow up session and she recommended Chlomid. I was kinda excited with the possibility. It was all very clinical, time measured, technical steps to ensure baby is conceived. But then, I'll be conducting a whole week training next week and can't go to the clinic for an injection. My gynae said I could still do without the injection but the timing must be right, which could pose a problem considering the timing of my ovulation time. Anyhow, I'd give it a go. We'll settle issues the best way we can. After taking the tablets at night, I have a mild allergic reaction the next afternoon. I tried again the second time... my eyes swell again. I read up about Chlomid and allergic reaction, and the general consensus was to stop immediately if any allergic reaction occur. Normally my allergic reaction would be really bad. I'd consider this reaction very mild. But prolonged doses could increase the risk. Should I stop or continue? Then hubby break the news he has to 'balik sana' early next week. I was devastated. I mean... of all the time, this could be our only chance.
I stopped myself before I get very emotional. It is all in His will. Kun fa yakun... The youtube video watched earlier calmed me down too. Astaghfirullahalazim.. I've had so many blessings and experienced many things that shows His power. 'La ilaha illa anta, subhanaka, inni kuntu minaz-zalimin'. Jika kita rasa kekurangan sesuatu, perhatikanlah apakah pula kelebihan yang kita ada. Jika kita rasa kita tidak dapat apa yang kita inginkan, perhatikanlah apa yang kita dah diberikan. I'm blessed with the love from people around me, I've spent many tender loving moments with hubby, and I've a job that some people envy. Alhamdulillah... I'll still be praying for a baby, but I'll not let this setback upset me too much. Dia lebih tahu apa yang terbaik untuk hambaNya.
I remember once I blogged about how difficult it is to sit down at home and have lunch together with hubby when I was working full time. Now, we have many of that moments together either with tapau or home cooked meals. Last time, we waited for public holiday that falls on weekdays to spend time together doing things that people normally do on holidays. Nowadays, we have many free time when I have no training and hubby's not busy. I appreciate our movie nights, jalan2 and cuddling moments that we share. I've make some lifestyle changes to enjoy what matters to me most and I'll keep counting my blessings throughout my life insyaAllah.
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Throbbing Headache
I'm having a throbbing headache from blowing my nose all day. I've had worse due to crying which also make me cry, nonetheless, this one is unbearable too. Sigh!
No painkillers or panadol since I'm allergic to it. So, suffer I will while preparing my training material & assignment till I fell asleep. Double sigh!!
Missing hubby a lot today...
No painkillers or panadol since I'm allergic to it. So, suffer I will while preparing my training material & assignment till I fell asleep. Double sigh!!
Missing hubby a lot today...
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Saturday Random Thoughts
Perasan tak lately blog ni banyak terisi bila ada banyak 'kerja sekolah'? Bila ada assignment ker, presentation ker, adalah orang yang meluahkan isi hati di sini :) Nak buat camana... this is one of my stress relieving technique hehehe....
The weather today is dark and gloomy due to the haze. Or maybe it really is cloudy and going to rain anytime soon. It doesn't look very different. I have always declared that I don't like this kind of weather. I do not perform or function well. It didn't help that I woke up with a sore throat and stuffed nose. I don't have flu yesterday. I did feel one nostril blocked every now and then and felt weird because I don't have runny nose. Today, both are blocked and blowing didn't help much.
I have a new pair of sports shoe courtesy of my sis who make the request and hubby for paying hehehe... I really wanted to wear it but the weather for the past few days is not good for outdoor activities. I'm not making excuses not to exercise tau abang :)
Early this morning, I received a message in my FB from someone claiming attracted to my smile and would like to know me better. Duh! My FB profile pic is a photo of me and hubby so no stupid person looking for a random relationship would want to go through the hassle on a person already with a partner right? So, is it to get me to deliver drugs or borrow money? I forward it to hubby immediately and he asked me to ignore it, which is my exact intention.
I'm actually in the midst of doing my work and not assignment this morning. I have to send the training material for printing next week for training scheduled the week after. Last time, preparing my training material is really daunting and time consuming. Now, it still is but to a lesser degree than my assignments as it didn't require research evidence. As to my thesis, still work in progress if you consider casual thinking as work :) Tomorrow, I have to give a presentation in class on topics that might appear in our final exam. It is 75% done.
OK... enough of random thoughts. Better get back to work if I want to enjoy my Wesak holiday. I thought hubby will stay till the holiday ends but he'll be back since he has a meeting on Monday so I want to truly spend quality time with him. Even though sometimes both of us worked at home but the spirit is different on holiday. He didn't have to sit in front of his laptop and not feel guilty about it :)
The weather today is dark and gloomy due to the haze. Or maybe it really is cloudy and going to rain anytime soon. It doesn't look very different. I have always declared that I don't like this kind of weather. I do not perform or function well. It didn't help that I woke up with a sore throat and stuffed nose. I don't have flu yesterday. I did feel one nostril blocked every now and then and felt weird because I don't have runny nose. Today, both are blocked and blowing didn't help much.
I have a new pair of sports shoe courtesy of my sis who make the request and hubby for paying hehehe... I really wanted to wear it but the weather for the past few days is not good for outdoor activities. I'm not making excuses not to exercise tau abang :)
Early this morning, I received a message in my FB from someone claiming attracted to my smile and would like to know me better. Duh! My FB profile pic is a photo of me and hubby so no stupid person looking for a random relationship would want to go through the hassle on a person already with a partner right? So, is it to get me to deliver drugs or borrow money? I forward it to hubby immediately and he asked me to ignore it, which is my exact intention.
I'm actually in the midst of doing my work and not assignment this morning. I have to send the training material for printing next week for training scheduled the week after. Last time, preparing my training material is really daunting and time consuming. Now, it still is but to a lesser degree than my assignments as it didn't require research evidence. As to my thesis, still work in progress if you consider casual thinking as work :) Tomorrow, I have to give a presentation in class on topics that might appear in our final exam. It is 75% done.
OK... enough of random thoughts. Better get back to work if I want to enjoy my Wesak holiday. I thought hubby will stay till the holiday ends but he'll be back since he has a meeting on Monday so I want to truly spend quality time with him. Even though sometimes both of us worked at home but the spirit is different on holiday. He didn't have to sit in front of his laptop and not feel guilty about it :)
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