When Not To Listen To People

How often do we have friends dishing out advices with good intention, but not necessarily the best for us. My guess, often enough throughout our life. There are many people who are uncertain with what they want and these people are very vulnerable to bad advices. I think what a good friend should do is to help their friends make a decision and not make the decision for them. Explore the pros and cons of a decision together; if it is an unknown matter, find some information that would help from books, a reliable person or the internet, and leave that person to come to a decision themselves.



I was just remembering few advices given by friends quite some time ago. When I wanted to buy a car, few friends said "Buy auto lah! It's difficult to drive in KL with manual. So difficult if you're at a traffic light and you're in front." Another one said, "Eh you've never driven before (except driving lessons of course)... you shouldn't immediately drive you car. Keep it at home and try driving out on weekends until you feel comfortable driving". And another advised, "Never drive in Jln Masjid India area. It's a nightmare. I prefer to leave my car at the LRT station and take the LRT to go there".



I can understand when some friends who don't know me enough to be giving out such advices. But what makes me wonder, a close friend also gives similar advice. She must have not really known me. I will never accept advice blindly until I try things myself, within reason of course. I don't have to try smoking or taking drugs to know it's not good for me. Millions of people drive a manual car. If it really is difficult, then manual cars would be phased out and only cars with automatic gears will roam the road right!



And there's also a streak of stubbornness in me. I'd like to prove to all these people that I 'CAN' drive a manual car, even at a busy place like Jln Masjid India, Jln TAR, Bukit Bintang area, or like a friend's uncle said (to her of course), "if you can drive in Rawang town, you can drive anywhere". The reason I bought a car is because I'm so fed-up waiting for 21C bus in front of Kotaraya to get to Taman Tun. I stayed at Pandan Indah last time. Despite leaving the house at 6.30, sometimes I only reached the office at 10.00 a.m. No way am I going to leave the car at home and only drive around on weekend. The best way to get competent is to practice often and that's also the reason for having a big 'P' sticker on your car isn't it.



Admittedly I was a bit clumsy on the first week but after that, I managed to conquer all the busy roads at ease. No problem at traffic lights, no problem when stuck in a jam and on a slope, and the most important thing, no more stress with our 1st world public transport. Now, if a friend asked for some advice on driving, I'd say be gung-ho. Just drive and you'll be fine in no time at all. The experience also strengthens what I already know. Don't fully trust other people's judgment. They are not you and if you blindly follow their advice, you'd never know what you're capable of.



Come to think of it, I'd say be gung-ho in anything that you do. What's the point of living if you look at some things in fear, especially fear of the unknown. Know what you want, get the right information and embrace the unknown.