Complicated Expectations

This is a story about you and Jamie. I chose Jamie because it is a unisex name. You can be Jamie Lee Curtis or Jamie Foxx. Both men and women can relate to Jamie. And then, there's Lou, just another boy or girl in the story.

How easy life is when you were just friends with Jamie. You talk about anything and everything because you were just friends. You told Jamie about Lou who is being too pushy in trying to get your attention and have a good laugh over it. You call or SMS or email at any time just because you have something to share and you know Jamie would love to hear from you. You become closer each day and then the friendship turns into a relationship. That's when life becomes more complicated.

You started to demand the attention verbally or non-verbally. You started to wish Jamie would do this or that if he/she were really into you. When you're away from each other, you expected Jamie to contact you because isn't Jamie supposed to miss you. Besides, Jamie contacted you before when you're away. Why must things be different now? The worst thing is when Jamie holds back because not too long ago you had a good laugh about Lou who is trying too hard to get your attention that it became a turned off. What Jamie didn't realize, it is OK for him/her to do the same thing Lou did because you like Jamie. There is a difference when someone you like do something to get your attention and someone you don't. But how do you tell Jamie that?

When two people, both expected the other to do something but nothing happened, they will begin to have doubts. Is he/she the only one having the special feeling? Is Jamie really into you? Doesn't Jamie know that sometimes you're having a mixed feeling and just needed a little reassurance from him/her? Time passes by and both you and Jamie hold more and more of yourselves back because the expectations are not met. You finally decided that Jamie is probably not that into you and the relationship started to wane. In the end, both you and Jamie would wonder what went wrong. You thought there was something going on but probably you're mistaken.

What a waste of good friendship to begin with. But such is the story of life. You expected Jamie to understand what you need. Jamie also expected the same. In the end, you thought if the other person didn't understand what you need, it wouldn't work out anyway. You continue with your life until you met another Jamie and the same cycle continues.

I wish I had the solution so you and Jamie can have a better relationship but I don't. The answer may lie in your communication with each other or your expectation towards each other. Whatever it is, if you're in similar situation, I wish you all the best.